My female-self can't be this cute
by Misaka 20.001
Summary: Once upon a time, A priest of Zeus encounter a pair of snakes mating and then hit them with a stick. He was then cursed by Hera to be a woman. And as many myths in this world are, they are real.


Pilot Episode

How it all began

* * *

My weekend was destroyed cruelly when a god descends and kidnapped me and several others as a sacrifice to powering an apocalypse device.

No kidding, it did really happen.

Do you think I am kidding?

Let me tell you from the beginning then. I myself didn't believe the first paragraph at first reading.

Okay then...where to begin...

My name is Charles Henry, coming from the legendary executioner who said to beheaded Marie Antoinette (He is not, it was his grandson). A morbid name for a kid but my parent always sort of weird so I didn't know anything about the executioner except 'A legendary hero who end France Revolution' (Again, he is not. My parent clearly lack understanding of history. Not that we are a France, either.)

As a child, I always curious and this made my parents worried sick. As morbid and horror my parents' hobbies are, any parents would be scared if I hang around a cursed house, active grimoire or powered statues. This earned me a nickname 'hound for powered object'.

So yeah, my family is not quite normal.

My first encounter with heretic god was in Los Angeles. There was a god who takes the airport hostages. The god Aztec that name I can't really remember (Justified by the fact I can't spell at that time and any Aztec God have a name that is hard to spell).

the heretic god was a natural disaster. it manifests as a hurricane but since my family was not quite normal, we see it as it is...A big snake...a very big snake.

My parents were captivated, it was their dream to see the horror of heretic god up close. The morbid curiosity, however, made them killed...

...Along with ten thousand people around me.

I was saved by a Campione who managed to kill the heretic god. But he didn't stick around. Instead, he sends me away. As with parent who loves a dangerous thing and captivated with heretic god, I share their love and instead captivated with the battle of a heretic god and Campione.

This was what drove me to learn and learn and later joining a magician organisation. A big one who based in England. my special abilities to smell a grimoire was a big help and I often go to the mission to search for grimoire. The fact that I am not dead yet is a prove of my skill rather than my luck.

I have never encountered any god or Campione after my first meeting in Los Angeles and the most dangerous opponent I have faced was the divine ancestor (that if they are hostile, RUN!). But they are few and honestly, I can count with my hand how many divine ancestors I have faced.

Exactly one.

The first time I meet Atlanta was when I traced a grimoire known as 'Tome of Herakles'. A rare tome that normal people never heard of and hence no information. It was mysterious tome but its power was dangerously felt within our radar. So my team was sent to retrieve it. We get the tome alright but it suddenly destroyed by an arrow that shot from somewhere (We can't even trace where the arrow come from.)

The next time we meet was under better circumstances. It was a fair warning from the green-haired maiden that if we locate anymore grimoire that contains Herakles's power, Atlanta will trace us and destroy every single piece of grimoire we got. It was a fact that no one can destroy grimoire. A divine ancestor capable of destroying them was unheard of, so we investigate.

It was a few years later that we managed to find the truth. Tome of Herakles that we found the first time was a fake that placed by Atlanta. The real one was somewhere else. Atlanta might be preventing something by hiding it, but my superior want tome for god knows why so we chased again. We tracked here and there and then found the tome we want to find and some.

In the black market in Greece, there were many people selling and buying a rare and old artefact. But most the buyers would buy a shiny one or interesting one. The tome we searched for however wasn't good for shiny or interesting. Most people would see it once and then dismissed it. I can smell a power for a mile away and then recognised the tome. It was ugly, it looks like normal slab of stone but it no doubt was a book. The cover was so heavy that it almost looks like a stone. It wasn't. We didn't know what it made from but grateful anyway since we got it cheap from the seller.

after a few calls, we research the tome and found the tome was made from gold. the reveal of the gold part, however, make a chain reaction that made us blasted back a few meters. This made Atlanta appear again and now to kill us. I survive that, somehow. But I think Atlanta just spare me because she wants to make an example of what would happen if someone didn't follow her suggestion. After all, none would hear how awesome she annihilated a group of knight if none survives, right?

So yeah, The only survivor and all that crap, I was decommissioned later. The tome of Herakles was also disappeared and not be found again.

After all that crap, I would think I can rebuild my life in the mundane side of the world. I was rich (all that money I got from after I was decommissioned can make me life without working for a few years), I was young and some girl ought to fall for me, right?

Yes, dream on. Because once you live in the magical side of the world with all of the crap it gives, You can't just go back to normality.

Not even a week after decommissioned, I smell the same smell I got from the tome of Herakles. It has been transported from Greece to Rome. How is that possible will be anyone guesses. But a tome that ruined my career was here. It was supposed to be my weekend, I have planned this and get a date for some girl...Some mundane girl...that is interested in how handsome I was. But the familiar smell makes me stop in my track.

I can go back to my mundane life, get a girl, get a life that I never have. But I miss tracking a grimoire and all that crap. I can choose, but you can guess my decision already, right?

I followed the smell.

It leads me to some kind of an old building that hidden from mundane eyes by a barrier. This kind of barrier was no doubt created by A divine ancestor, but this is not Atlanta's style. After years of researching about her, I kinda know her style of magic, her preference and who she is supposed to be if she did regain her godly power. After a few meeting with her, I also know why she tries to secure the Tome of Herakles and anything related to Herakles.

So I can't help but feel that some other Divine Ancestor used the tome was my fault. Atlanta has tried to hiding for centuries after all.

"So I see you have been here again, young man,"

The voice was pleasant to hear. She is, after all, a beautiful maiden. But the fact that the green-haired divine ancestor was here means today will fucked up pretty soon.

"I am sorry Atlanta, But I am not here to be in your way anymore. I was decommissioned after you hunt all of my team," I said with a weak smile.

Atlanta was shorter than me and look younger. If someone sees both of us they might think I was a lolicon or something. Her hair was tied in twin-tail showing that instead of human ear, she has lion ear instead (or cat. one of her victims was a man who insults her ears as cat ears), giving innocent look on her face, but the fact that she is carrying a bow and arrow can make anyone who wants to approach her afraid. Added by a fang that peeked out of her lips, you would think Atlanta can bite you to death.

"Do you griefing for them, young man?" the Divine Ancestor asked.

"No," I answered bluntly, "We know the risk. I am quite disturbed though why you didn't kill me."

"You have an ability that I didn't have," Atlanta answered, "And although you give me a hard time, I want that ability to alive and passed down."

"So anyway, the tome was inside this building. Is it your doing?" I asked, "Since I will leave if that the case. You have warned me enough to not get close on that tome after all."

"I am quite happy you learned your lesson, young man," the green-haired girl smiled, a smile that made any male melted, "But sadly, no. Thanks to your team revealing the golden cover, now every god and goddess that related to the tome will hunt it down. The Divine ancestor who is inside this building was the worst of them. A reason why I hide the tome."

Our friendly(?) conversation was interrupted however when a horde of peacock suddenly appeared around us. It wasn't friendly peacock either as they were looking fiercely at us. How a peacock can look fierce is anyone guesses.

"We would think that a divine ancestor such as you won't be showing weakness to us," A voice boomed, "But it seemed we misunderstood you, Atlanta."

"Cydippe," Atlanta suddenly hissed.

"No matter, We would gracefully receive your sacrifice," the voice boomed again.

It was that moment when the horde of peacock attacked. You know, as beautiful as their tail is, they are pretty ferocious in battle. This wasn't helped by the fact they are bigger than a normal peacock. So I pull out my gun, my favoured weapon for hunting a grimoire and then start shooting. As they overwhelmed us, I found it pretty annoying that again, my bullet, as magical as it is, can't fare well against a divine monster.

* * *

So yeah, we back to the first paragraph.

As it turned out, I wasn't the only one who got kidnapped by this divine ancestor. Cydippe if I remember correctly what Atlanta said. She wasn't a hero or a legendary figure I can think of. So probably obscure one. But the most obscure a divine ancestor is, its easier to track who they used to be. Anyway, back at situations in hand, I was put on a kind of big bowl made of gold with several other people. There are many kinds of person here, a male, a female, a European descend, an Asian descend. So I didn't know how this divine ancestor chose her sacrifice.

Most sacrifice to call upon god was using a maiden. A Hime Miko was the best example. But it obvious that most of the sacrifice here was mundane. I can see Atlanta hovering above us with a snake bound her limbs. The divine ancestor who kidnapped us was huge. Not just tall, but actually bigger than normal human. This woman has curly hair and a cruel expression. But this kind of woman can't be called 'maiden' because where Atlanta was youthful like most Divine Ancestor, Cydippe was actually grown, adult. Not many divine ancestors take this form because they claim they are stronger when their youth at its peak.

"We would like to thank you, Atlanta," Cydippe said, "We was confused as to how getting our hand on a magician and a divine ancestor without gaining too much attention. But you come to us with this young man. If only he were female instead."

Atlanta said something, but it can't be heard because of gag in her mouth. I dutifully keep my mouth shut since Cydippe obviously wants me specifically.

"No, I think this might work," Cydippe said, "I cast upon Tiresias once upon a time. It was such a long time that I remember about this curse again."

And then from Cydippe hand, a pair of a snake appeared and then surrounding me. They actually had the time to mate in front of me while snarling and hissing at me threateningly. Panic brought my foot and step on the snake. The bound made it hard but I hate snake with passion. So I managed to stand and then jumped to land on the snake. I jumped a few time and after that the snakes were dead.

It was then I regretted my decision.

Did she say Tiresias?

* * *

Once upon a time, A priest of Zeus encounter a pair of snakes mating and then hit them with a stick. He was then cursed by Hera to be a woman. You didn't need to know why the priest wants to hit a pair of snake that are trying to peacefully mate. The legend didn't say anything about that. But that was the earlier case of gender bender before Japan's popular media put it into their fiction.

And as many myths in this world are, they are real.

I just stepped on mating snakes.

And it cursed me to be female.

Oh crap!

* * *

Cydippe laughed when I gain a breast and lost my male pride. My frame become thinner and I was shorter now, so my clothes are baggier. My hair was grown longer and somehow tied itself into a ponytail. The gender bender was including a style of fashion apparently as my pants were transformed into a skirt. How my underwear also changed wasn't something I want to question myself.

I was turned to the girl.

Oh crap! Oh crap! Oh crap! Oh crap! Oh crap! Oh crap!

Think Charles. What you would do in this case? My limbs were bounded but my mouth wasn't gagged. It was weird why Cydippe gagged Atlanta and I wasn't. But I think it a safe bet when I say Cydippe didn't care much about what Human said.

So I have my mouth as a weapon. They did say a word is mightier than a sword, right?

"So, Sydippe, It was nice and all being turned to female. But really? Do you expect me to be a damsel in distress?" I asked.

Cydippe at first didn't care about me, so I continued.

"There is the countless goddess that can do this feat," I continued, "And honestly I have been turned to female before. I was prettier than this, you know."

At that Cydippe looked at me.

"You dare to say our power is inferior?" she asked angrily.

"No no, Your curse obviously long-lasting," I said with the bemused tone, "But honestly, there was a time with a tome that cursed me to be female," Lie, "And I fall in love with that female version of myself. This form however inferior to that time. Ask Atlanta, she is the one who leads me to that tome after all."

Atlanta look surprised, but a smirk later she understood what my intention is.

"Atlanta, is that true? what tome does this young speak of?" Cydippe asked.

No matter how old they are, Divine Ancestor and Heretic God were easy to anger when someone challenged their power. I just need to trust Atlanta that she has some kind of way to save us with mouth alone. This because I suspect that Cydippe gagged Atlanta because Atlanta can call upon something with only talking.

"Ha, you think you can trick us, young man?" Cydippe said, "No, you will be my sacrifice now. As all of our preparation are done. Now lets the banquet begin."

Cydippe raised her hand and then chanted something on old greek. AS my greek was rusty at best, I can only hear her mentioning something about the dove, broken glass and a burned cow. And at that, a magical circled above us. One by one the people around me screamed as a soul was taken from their body. I can't see soul, but the way they just drop dead around me kinda made it obvious. as time goes, a light surrounded her and slowly she grows bigger.

What to do?

"Now, I gained my godhood again," she said, "But this is not enough! I have turned into Hera but I still feel powerless!"

"Really, Cydippe? You think it was a threat?" I laughed, "I would think that I just insulted you."

You know, If I was in my right mind, I won't say that. But she still didn't budge.

"If some tome can make a male look prettier when they turned female. I think Zeus would use that to make some random dude female and then rape him," I laughed, "No, on second thought, Zeus was raping anything that moves right? As Hera, I am sure you know it very well."

At this Cydippe glared at me, she stopped chanting right at the time when the last person drops dead. Any later probably would take my soul as well.

"You dare to insult Zeus?"

I think I just fucked up big time. Cydippe has become heretic goddess and here I am insulting her husband.

"We will make you suffer and beg to get killed!" She said.

"Is that the most creative way you can think of?" I asked tauntingly, "There was a most creative way to get back at people who insult a god you know. There was a grimoire that turned me to mouse. It didn't feel pleasant and I stopped insulting Loki after that."

"You dare say our way is inferior to that mischief god of Norse?" again Cydippe (No, she is Hera now) felt insulted.

So, what would happen if I insult more? I know I shouldn't be enjoying insulting a divine ancestor must less a heretic goddess. But as I saw Atlanta doing something behind Hera's back I think I should keep the distraction.

"Ha, Loki can get creative most of the time and he is not even in the mortal realm," I said, "Oh boy, don't get me started on your way of gathering power. Kidnapping random people from the street and adding one magician and one divine ancestor won't yield as much as the power you want, I think that why you still want me as sacrifice right?"

"And how do you know?"

"I have witnessed one really. Did everything you do have been done by someone before?" I asked.

This earns me raged shout by Hera and then she jumped towards the big golden bowl.

"I will torture you!" she said.

"That was very creative," I said with sarcasm.

She then grabbed my collar and taking out a short knife from...somewhere.

"Do you know what is this knife boy?" she showed it, "This is a knife that used by Medea to chop her brother. we managed to get this after hunting it down several centuries. Medea, after all, was betrayed wife and we feel we will get along well. we want to use this to raise her when we attain our godhood. But we think she will be happy when we use this knife to separate your body from your soul."

"Oh, I meet an Egypt god once that did that to me as a joke," I said.

"Enough!" Cydippe shouted.

But before she gets anywhere with separating my soul from my body, suddenly a very big bear (understatement) landed behind Hera and clawed her away from me. I was dropped roughly, but I was safe and I was alive. That was something I need to be grateful for. Looking at the bear, I can see little girl sat on the big bear shoulder.

"Good job, young man," Atlanta said, "One would think you are helpless without your hand or foot. But apparently your mouth is a good weapon as well."

"Call me Charles, and can you free me now? I didn't want to get on your way when you beat the crap out of Cydippe."

Atlanta laughed.

"One didn't usually call a mortal by its name," Atlanta said, "But I think you earned my honour, Charles."

The very big bear (understatement) uses his big claw to free me from my bind. I still feel awkward with my female body. But the moment Hera roared and summoned a giant peacock I decided to get clear.

* * *

The battle between the bear and peacock was fierce. Added with arrow and magic have thrown around it was epic. My heart throbbing and it has nothing to do with a breast hanging on my chest. It has been a long time since I watched a battle of god. Divine ancestor as diminished as they are still a mountain compared to a human. When they throw their beam, it can gouge a mountain. The fact that the golden bowl didn't just crack when Hera's magic landed on it was a testament of its power.

Just what is this item made from?

That aside, The bear was fierce and the more attack he did, the more feather fall from the peacock's tail. But sadly they were in a stalemate. They are strong and only one slip can decide who will win. This was when I noticed the knife of Medea Cydippe dropped was near me. So I took it. Apparently I did angry at the divine ancestor about turning me to female. So I Lunged to her.

"Atlanta, Stand back!" I said.

And she did. I don't honestly know why, but at this hormone powered moment, I lunged and jumped right in front of the peacock. Cydippe who riding this peacock was surprised and this second was enough for me to throw the knife at her face.

I would think I mere knife wouldn't be able to kill a heretic goddess. But it was enough to hurt her. She roared and pull out the knife from her face. I landed and running away as fast as I can, but Hera chased me with her mount. At that time, Atlanta's bear pulled Hera's peacock tail and it made Hera fall from her mount. I pulled my gun (how it was still there was mysteries. Probably because Cydipped didn't recognise a gun as a weapon) and aimed at Hera.

One bullet in her wound makes her shouting something in ancient greek. I think she was blinded and I take the chance to get closer. If this bullet can't kill her from distance then I will shot her point-blank. But Hera was bigger than me and I need to climb over her to reach her face. I think hurting her where it hurt was the best chance for me to kill her.

Hera tries to throw me away, but an Arrow managed to make her fall on her butt and it made me easier to climb on her face. when I did, I emptied my gun to her face. For a few moments, the goddess of jealousy was screaming in pain. But when the last bullet reaching her face, she didn't move anymore.

Damn, I am tired.

* * *

ps: This fanfic have been posted in AO3 so if you read this over there, that was my AO3 account and I am not plagiarizing anything.


End file.
